


Anything but this

by orphan_account



Category: Gintama
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Marriage Proposal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-09
Updated: 2015-06-09
Packaged: 2018-04-03 14:28:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4104256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>If there was anything he thought he’d never do, even after an eternity, it would be this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Anything but this

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Gintama and its characters belong to Hideaki Sorachi.

If there was anything he thought he’d never do, even after an eternity, it would be this.

He’s got to be insane. He’s got to be. Or maybe just overly bored for his life that he’d have to come down to this to entertain himself. There isn’t any explanation otherwise.

Nothing else could explain why he was standing outside a dressing room holding a bouquet in his hand, and the other fiddling with the little box he had in his pocket. Glancing to the glass door on his left, checking whether he looked alright. He got himself dressed in a Western suit, entirely different from his usual traditional Japanese wear. It was uncomfortable for him, but it was only just this once.

“Just one time,” he mumbled to himself.

Just one time, he would stuff his ego and insults in the bag. He’d _try_ at the very least. He knew it was going to be difficult for himself. This whole thing was ridiculous. This was very much unlike him.

It wasn’t normal of him to feel so anxious. He was Sougo Okita, the young, famous national kendo champion. He rarely lost to anyone. Women were batting their lashes everywhere he went, some too desperate to get into his pants. The media praised him exuberantly – about his looks, charisma and skills.

He knew how good he was.

He never had to chase after anything or anyone, it all just came to him instead.

But this… This was all too new to him. He’s never done this; never even had the _thought_ run across his mind before. He almost felt like backing out. Walk away, put the bouquet in the bin and sell the ring for a good price. Maybe he really should-

 _Man up,_ he told himself.

This is it. Just this once.

Slowly, he raised his fist, already clenched from all the nervousness. He took a sharp breath and knocked on the door.

In that moment, anxiety really did cloud his mind.

_Maybe she really does hate you._

_She could be in love with someone else already._

_You’ll regret this sooner or later._

_You’re not good enough for her-_

“Yes,” he heard her muffled voice call out. He suddenly couldn’t feel himself breathing.

The door opened, revealing a Kagura still decked in a Chinese-styled acrobat costume, hair done up to two buns. She was holding a small box of _sukonbu_ while nibbling on a piece.

She looked up to see who it was.

The piece of _sukonbu_ fell from her lips.

* * *

 

When Sougo saw her reaction, he almost laughed.

He managed to suppress it, _thank God_. The last thing he wanted right now was to aggravate her and have the door slammed into his face.

The girl in front of him was easy to irate, after all. She had a little bit of a violent tendency to those she seemed to dislike.

Well, there was only one on that list.

Sougo supposed it was partly his fault. He just couldn’t seem to stop running out of things to say that could incite an amusing reaction from her. He never got tired of watching her fume because of him.

In fact, he couldn’t get tired of just watching her.

Since way back, Sougo was fond of her being in his company whenever both had the time to spare, even though he hated to admit it. They had been friends – or the closest to what they could call it – since he was in high school. She was still in middle school, then. Her family had moved in to the town and they had been neighbours ever since.

She had a quirky, crude speech and the epitome of what it was like to _not_ be a lady. She had the appetite that would never be sated. She was quick to anger, but equally quick to forgive. She had strange friends and her loyalty to them was beyond the norm of a schoolgirl. And although she was lazy in her studies, she had never skipped an acrobat training.

They used to fight and argue over the stupidest things, throwing insults just to piss each other off. They seemed to hate each other’s guts more than anything.

Despite her lithe figure, she could pack quite the punch. Her strength was almost superhuman. Sougo fought and wrestled with her often, after he passes a comment or two about her appearance or anything else he could think of.

It had been enjoyable for him, wrestling with a naïve girl who never bothered about looks, status and age. Aside from his sister, she was the only one he freely took his mask off for. And even though she knew what he was really like, she treated him all the same.

There wasn’t much to hide from her. Somehow, she always seemed to figure out whenever he was hiding something and threatened him to spill it out. She was honest; blunt. If she had something to say, she’d say it.

When his sister died, all he felt was emptiness and numbness. He didn’t know what he should be feeling. He just wanted to sleep, perhaps eternally. She had been the one to break into his room, her face stained with tears and snot, tackling and hugging him, telling him it was all going to be okay and that she would always be there for him.

He broke down that day for the first time in a long while after his parents had passed away. There wasn’t anyone else. He felt so alone, it shook him. He sobbed into her chest, clutching her back as she cradled him close, whispering little reassurances to calm him down.

* * *

 

Even after witnessing all of that, she still treated him as she always did. They continued their bantering and silly fights until they both got too busy to do so. Both of them had moved out of their own homes to stay in their respective apartments. He received much attention for his kendo skills and had several sponsors fighting for him. On the other hand, she, too, was getting just as much attention for her acrobat performances.

Even so, they called and met up with each other often, still throwing insults at each other and arguing over little things. It had been the same as always, except they had stopped wrestling.  People speculated and believed that they were dating, but neither of the two actually made it official. They had never uttered a word about it in the slightest. It didn’t need to be said.

Sougo wondered when exactly he grew conscious of how he felt for her. As they somehow spent more time together, it was almost as if everything was too difficult to keep from spilling over. In more ways than one, he was aware of how deep his feelings were for her.

He just couldn’t admit it and think about it seriously.

They shared their first kiss together at a New Year’s festival. It resulted in him getting punched in the gut, but he figured it was worth seeing her face as red as her usual get-up.

Then, things just went downhill from there.

They had their first night with each other when he was upset over his first loss in a match. He thought it wouldn’t be too bad to have her in his arms when he woke up each day. He managed to convince her to move in with him in the end. Their days went on as normally as ever although the affectionate gestures seemed to multiply.

Sougo believed he was content with that. Until he had an awful dream that left him in cold sweat, gasping to breathe as he held onto her.

He saw his sister, deathly pale and standing in a pool of blood, the same colour as his eyes. She merely stared at him, a stricken expression that bore through him. His sister stepped away, showing him what was behind her.

It was _her_.

She laid there.

 _Not moving_.

Unbelieving, he crawled to her, touching her cold, lifeless body. He couldn’t breathe. He held on to her, begging her to wake up and stay with him. From his peripherals, he saw his sister uttering something.

He woke up after that. Kagura kept asking and threatening him to tell her what it was about, but Sougo was determined to let nothing spill.

* * *

 

It was impossible for him to just say those three words directly. He wouldn’t be able to live if he did. He was a man that spoke more with his actions rather than his words, after all.

He had to think of something else that would definitely get it across.

He asked her father – or rather, her foster father – about it. About what she dreamed of and probably never expected out of him. Her father was kind enough to show him her old diaries he still happened to keep.

And that was how he ended up like this, standing in front of her in the suit with the bouquet.

Anything would probably be a better idea than this.

Honestly, maybe saying those three words would have been _much_ simpler.

“S-Sadist,” she regarded him questioningly. Her eyes trailed over him, examining his entire appearance.

“China.”

Seeing as he decided to say nothing else, she continued disbelievingly, “Why are you… What are you doing?”

After a moment of silence that lasted a little too long, Sougo held out the bouquet to her.

“For you.”

“W-What?”

“China, did you go deaf?”

“No,” she hissed. “Who is it from?”

A pause.

“It’s from me.”

She stared at him incredulously. He rolled his eyes and sighed.

“Your performance today was beautiful, as always. I enjoyed it. I thought you finally deserved something from me, at least.” He tried sounding casual.

Her eyes widened, and then narrowed. She looked pissed.

Inwardly, Sougo panicked. _What the hell did I do this time?!_ He was sure to tone it down considerably.

“Sadist, what are you up to?” she asked, seething.

“What-“

“I know how much you love pranking me and getting me angry. If this is another one of your stupid jokes, get the hell out of here before I-“

_No. That’s not it._

“No, China, that’s not-“

“Not what?! You always do this to me. I’ve had enough of-“

Things were crumbling apart way too fast. Sougo needed her to listen for just a bit before things got out of control. He moved closer to her, gently moving his hand to hers, and the other to her cheek.

“What the hell-“

“Kagura.”

* * *

 

At the sound of her name, she fell silent. Her eyes growing wide again. He barely ever calls her by her name. She held her breath.

Their held their gazes for a while, both a little too spell-bound.

Sougo was hesitant. He wondered if he was able to say it right.

“Today-“

His heart was beating a little too fast. He closed his eyes for a moment and breathed in before continuing.

“Today, I’m trying to be as honest as I can be with you. You know I’m really bad at things like this. Just- Just listen to me for a bit.”

After what seemed like a millennium, she nodded wordlessly.

He placed his forehead onto hers, sighing softly. He gently pushed her into the room and slowly closed the door behind them.

Locking his gaze with hers, he held the bouquet out to her again.

“It’s for you. I thought you’d like it,” he said, slightly embarrassed.

She nodded slowly, receiving it from him while mumbling an equally embarrassed ‘thank you’.

Neither of them said anything for a while. They just stared at each other, wondering what the other was thinking.

Sougo broke the silence.

“You know, we’ve been together for a while already. And you seem pretty comfortable at my place.”

He paused, fiddling with the box in his pocket.

He swallowed.

He took the box out and threw it at her.

She caught it. She stared at it hopefully. As she opened the box, Sougo looked away.

“I’m already paying for most of the bills already. No one else can pay for a gluttonous monster like you, I’m sure. That dog of yours too.”

He glanced at her. She was still staring at its content.

“If it was another guy, you’d probably break his heart the minute you moved in with him.”

He noticed her move slightly. He didn’t dare look up.

“Maybe even break his bones too. I’m saving the men of humanity here-“

He was rambling now, unsure of what he was even saying anymore. Sougo honestly felt afraid. He wasn’t used to this uneasiness. He feared her rejection, imagining her laughing at him and making fun of him for being so stupid.

But he had to know. There was still a possibility of her accepting it – accepting _him_. And he decided to hold on that possibility.

“I know a good caterer with awesome food if you-“

Sougo’s rambling got cut off as Kagura tackled him to the ground in tight embrace.

Sougo groaned, “Ugh, what the hell was that, China?”

He looked down and was startled to speechlessness.

His China was burying her snotty, tear-stained face into his chest. She was sobbing quietly, hiccups occasionally surfacing.

Sougo was not entirely sure on what to do.

He gently placed a calloused hand over the back of her head, patting and smoothing over it in an attempt to calm her down.

“Hey,” he started, softening his voice. “I won’t make you regret it.”

She looked up into his eyes, her own glistening.

“I promise.”

At his whispered words, she smiled softly. He smiled back.

They both sat up, holding each other’s hands.

Wordlessly, Sougo took the ring and slipped it onto her finger as Kagura’s cheek was dusted a shade of red.

They moved closer together, neither pair of eyes leaving the other, and they kissed.

 _Yep, this is definitely better_.

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to try a subtle atmosphere between these two idiots. I'm not sure whether I pulled it off well, but I hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
